


Carry On

by theGirlwithtoomanyOTPs



Category: SQ系列, Tamen de Gushi, 她们的故事 | Their Story
Genre: Closure, F/F, because I love Mo Xiaonan, implied!Qiu Tong/Sun Jing, mo xiaonan needs some love, my girl is brave and strong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-03-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:07:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23283745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theGirlwithtoomanyOTPs/pseuds/theGirlwithtoomanyOTPs
Summary: What's done is done. She wiped her face with her handkerchief, determined not to shame herself more than she already had.
Relationships: Qiu Tong/Sun Jing
Comments: 5
Kudos: 26





	Carry On

**Author's Note:**

> I CAN'T BELIEVE NO ONE WROTE ABOUT MO XIAONAN! LIKE! HOW?! SHE IS A GREAT CHARACTER DESPITE SO LITTLE APPEARANCES!

"Tch. What are you looking at me like that for?"

She spun away from her. She gripped her bag tightly with one hand. She tries to put on her outdoor shoes faster with the other hand.

There is some silence. Mo Xiaonan feels a pit in her stomach. She's made it clear she would never have a chance. She should have seen it too. But she'd been far too enamored and blind to the fact that Sun Jing wouldn't give her the same attention.

Mo Xiaonan could feel hot tears burning in her eyes at remembering her birthday. It was so embarrassing, throwing a huge party to impress someone, and waiting for that same someone who never came. No amount of coaxing, presents, good food and well-wishers could tear her eyes away from the doors. She didn't even get to enjoy her birthday and spent the rest of the night sulking after the party.

What's done is done. She wiped her face with her handkerchief, determined not to shame herself more than she already had.

"I just wanted to see--" Sun Jing hesitates and cuts herself off. Mo Xiaonan could imagine her small and serious frown. It made her mad. "I wanted to apologize."

Her knuckles turned white with the force she gripped her bad. She turned to Sun Jing, eyes fiery.

"I don't want your apologies," she spat out, as coldly as she possibly can. "You don't feel the same. You've said your part. Here's mine: I don't want your pity or sorry."

She manages not to tear up or stammer. How funny. Months ago, she could barely string sentences around her. It took all her energy and will to invite Sun Jing to her birthday party. She couldn't even say it herself at first. She remembered the rush, the feeling like her heart was going to burst, and how she had to hide in one of the girl's room stalls so no one could see how red and sweaty she'd been. Every interaction with Sun Jing basically took her breath away. Her friends would always say she was brave and strong. But they didn't even know how a mess she was all the time after. She had really, desperately, liked Sun Jing.

"I won't take back what I said," she tells Sun Jing. "I confessed. You rejected me. That's all there is to it. Good bye."

To be honest, after her rejection, Mo Xiaonan had been at lost of how to proceed. Mo Xiaonan had never dealt with being rejected before. She had good grades, never had any trouble, won a few cello competitions when she was younger, was even a model for a while and had to stave off confessions herself. So this was entirely new to her. She didn't think she could ever show her face to Sun Jing ever again.

She'd avoided Sun Jing like a plague, opposite to when she had spents every day trying to find her whenever she had the free time to come across her by 'accident'. She made excuses to not go to shared Physical Ed with Sun Jing's class. She spent time after classes looking for new noodle houses, chowing down as much spicy noodles as she can so she could pretend her tears were because of how hot the food was.

She didn't regret having feelings for Sun Jing. She just hated how despite the embarrassment and the heartache, she still liked Sun Jing. She diagnosed herself as having had a stupid heart. So she thought, she could just avoid seeing Sun Jing until it gained sense again. But seeing Sun Jing looking so torn about approaching her and looking so pathetic made her angrier. She liked this dork why again?

"Wait, Mo Xiaonan!"

Sun Jing's hand was big and warm around her tiny wrist. Too warm. She immediately pulled away, cheeks flaring.

"I'm not pitying you!" Sun Jing cried out, eyes steely. She then blushes, realizing people were now staring. She coughs away the shame and stands up straighter. God, she was tall. Mo Xiaonan felt so tiny next to her like that. "I wanted to thank you!"

_Thank_ her? What on earth--?

"I've... I've been there before." Sun Jing says, growing quieter. "I couldn't talk to Qiu Tong. I couldn't tell her I liked her. I was a coward. But you. You... you were brave."

Mo Xiaonan's brows pulled together in confusion. Sun Jing sees this and wrings her hands, seemingly frustrated at being unable to communicate better.

"Aargh!"

_She looked so cute._

Mo Xiaonan was reminded of the times how she watched Sun Jing, so enamored with her face and her expressions. Sometimes she would giggle all by herself while watching Sun Jing from far away that her friends would question her sanity. Maybe she was a little bit insane, liking this tall and awkward person. She always imagined being Sun Jing's girlfriend. How she would lean up on her tip toes and press a kiss on her cheek if she made this or that expression. Her face softened. She definitely had a stupid heart.

"Maybe you're just hungry. You could have noodles with me so you can talk. Well... if you had the time."

The last words were spoken so low because she could feel her heart tighten and weigh even heavier than usual.

Sun Jing doesn't answer for only a second. "That's a great idea. I won't be meeting Qiu Tong until later, anyhow. Wow, you really know me well..."

Mo Xiaonan turns away again, knowing her cheeks have reddened once more.

"But it's your treat and I'm picking where we go."

"Alright."

* * *

When the bowls are placed in front of them, she ignores her companion and dives in straight away. The noodles are as spicy as ever, tickling her nose and burning her entire mouth. She slurps some soup in and uses a tissue to wipe under her nose, which was already wet with how spicy it is.

She looks across at Sun Jing and almost laughs. Sun Jing's face looks absolutely mortified and scared, even.

"What? Can't handle spicy noodles of all things?" She can't help but tease her.

Sun Jing's face contorts. "Hell no!"

She takes her chopsticks and shoves noodles in her mouth, slurps soup and swallows. She does this over and over until her bowl is finished. She looks dreadful and her eyes watery at the end.

"See!" Sun Jing proclaims, all red and sweaty.

"Pfft! Hahaha!" Mo Xiaonan covers her mouth with both hands as she laughs some more.

* * *

Sun Jing wipes her face and smiles to herself as she watches Mo Xiaonan laugh.

"Look," she begins again. Mo Xiaonan stops her laughter and her face darkens, as if she now remembers why they were there. "I really am thankful. Thankful someone actually liked me. That someone liked and cared about me so much that they would risk their heart out like that. I guess what I was trying to say earlier is I know how risky and scary and hurtful it could be, to know you could be rejected but confess anyway. You're amazing, Mo Xiaonan. You're caring and sweet and really great."

Another blush creeps up on Mo Xiaonan's cheeks and Sun Jing smiles.

"You're really pretty too!" She grins a hundred kilowatt smile. "I mean all of it! Someone out there will be lucky to have your affection one day. I'm just sorry I can't be what you want me to be. Because I _really_ love Qiu Tong."

Mo Xiaonan's face drops to a certain coldness that Sun Jing has been seeing lately. It still seemed unnatural and felt wrong to her. She was just so used to seeing Mo Xiaonan smile. She kinda missed it. Sun Jing feels afraid she had said that wrong. But she did mean all of it.

The peach-haired girl simply picks up her chopsticks and uses both hands to roll it between her fingers. She keeps her eyes on the chopsticks and says, "I know... I can see the way you look at her. How you act with her. I've never seen you look so _happy_... Maybe that's why it hurts. Because all I wanted for you is to be happy. Just that... when I imagined it, you were happy with me instead."

Sun Jing doesn't know how to respond to that, so she merely waits. She doesn't have to wait too long because Mo Xiaonan speaks again.

"It's fine, Sun Jing," she sighs. "It's all fine. I still want you to be happy, after all, since you're someone I like so much. I just don't think I can stick around to see you happy with someone else."

Mo Xiaonan starts picking at her noodles again then eats with less gusto as before.

"I understand. I don't want to be selfish and ask more from you after that. But..."

Mo Xiaonan looks up to her, mid-slurp on her noodles.

"But maybe when you're feeling better about things, we can be friends? Like, real friends this time."

* * *

Sun Jing's eyes had always been pretty. But Mo Xiaonan thinks they were prettiest when she had the same sincere look as she had now. It was impossible to say no to those eyes.

She chews on her noodles for a bit then sighs. "Fine. But you have no choice but get me a big present for my next birthday."

_"Ehh???"_

Mo Xiaonan stares back defiantly and Sun Jing sighs this time.

"Fine, fine. I'll get you a nice and big birthday present."

Sun Jing holds up a hand over the table.

"So... we'll be friends one day again, deal?"

Mo Xiaonan stares at Sun Jing's hand. Sun Jing can see the hesitation in her eyes. It takes a few seconds before Mo Xiaonan takes it. Her hand is way smaller than hers, dainty and soft. But she had a good and strong grip.

Mo Xiaonan shakes her hand. "Deal."

* * *

And this time, Sun Jing was determined to be her friend, it seemed.

Mo Xiaonan doesn't really speak to her. But every day, Sun Jing goes out of her way to greet her good morning. Or even make small talk about school work. Ask how she was doing. She even shares snacks she's seen Mo Xiaonan takes to school. Sun Jing waves at her whenever she sees her and smiles, even if Mo Xiaonan doesn't return it. Sun Jing also helped her during Physical Ed whenever she had any trouble. Sometimes, she would ask for her notes when she fell asleep in class, like any normal friend would. And most importantly, without any invitation or reminder whatsoever, Sun Jing is there on her birthday, her one arm bearing a big box almost as large as Mo Xiaonan's torso, while her other hand was clasped tightly with Qiu Tong's.

Mo Xiaonan grabs the gift, and welcomes them to her home with a smile.

**Author's Note:**

> I've always wanted to write something about Mo Xiaonan. Preferably about her being too strong for a broken heart and something about eating spicy ramen trying not to cry. It isn't really touched here but heh, my girl needs some love and justice and that is what truly matters. This will probably be the only thing I write that is Tamen de Gushi-related. Bec tbh, the entire thing looks like fluffy fan fiction already and almost perfect. Also wow, can't believe I wrote that in one sitting *eyes my WIPs guiltily*


End file.
